Full Circle

Ever feel like no matter where you put yourself, or what you make yourself do... it's never enough?
I'm coming to see this in myself, it's not a problem with the world, it's a problem with me.

I've been quiet for some time here, the veil I pulled on covered things well enough, and for some time I was able to forget my past and look forwards, but maybe it was all a lie.

What I am getting at here, is my fundamental self sabotage I seem to conduct on a daily basis.
I would tear your world in half just to get what I want

But when I have it?   It's not what I thought it should be.


So here I am, still sitting here, typing into this little window, still hoping someone out there will jump in and go

"Hey it turns out your problem is a lack of iron, eat more salad and you'll be happy!"

But fuck that noise, it's not some chemical issue, nor a physical malady.  It's just my demon sitting on my shoulder, pushing me away from the things I should really be doing to make me happy.  That little shadow inside all of us...

I need an angel